Would you be ashamed?

kmk108

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Ok, so here's the background story. My neice of 8 months was diagnosed with cancer this last February. My sister and her husband never had a lot of money, but this has been a killer for them. They recieved all the treatment needed to do chemo and now the cancer is gone. They have no money now, since the husband only works as a credit collector, and my sister doesn't have a job because she takes care of the baby all day. They recently had to move into my parent's house because they have a hard enough time paying for food, they couldn't pay for a house. They didn't want very many people to know they were moving back home, and didn't even tell some of their closest friends. I'm only telling you guys cuz you'll probably never meet me or them :laugh2:.

I think it's crazy that they're ashamed to move in with my parents because it's not liked they pissed their money away. They have to pay for meds that the baby has to pretty much be constantly taking, and all of the formula that they have to give her. What do you guys think?
 

Nicky

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They should be proud to be such good parents. Bless 'em both...
 

KSG_Standard

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There's no need for shame. It's good that their baby is getting better, and it's good to have family that cares and can help. Everybody wins.:thumb:
 

kmk108

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haha. my mom can't wait until they move out. They've been in the house for less than a month of their estimated year long stay, and my mom's pulling her hair out, but she knows they have no other choice.
 

PapaSquash

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Every man wants to be the provider for his family. It's not unusual to feel a little deflated by having to rely on others for your family's needs. The resulting humility can be good for you though. We all need each other. When I got hurt a few years ago, I learned to let people help. I needed it, and they really wanted to be able to do something and my relationships are better as a result. It still felt awkward to have somebody else mow the lawn or take care of the house.
 

X–Ray

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i would probably feel everything under the sun - yet it is my hope that my emotions will not paralyze my analytical abilities regarding discerning the best possible course of action.

it is sad they feel shame imo - i have no power over what they feel - i have empathy for them - however, given all of the details of the situation, the shared emotion of shame is not relevant to me - only their actions - they took the right action based on reality, not emotions.

when their reality changes - then they can take new right actions which may not be shaming for them - that is a bonus but not essential.

not only do i hold hope for their reality improving, i also hold hope one day they will appreciate the wisdom in taking the current correct actions...

"happiness is the by-product of right living"
 

thrawn86

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I wouldn't feel shame per se, but rather an unbending urge to get myself going again. As the man of my house, I'd do everything within reason to keep from moving back in with my folks. Of course, not having an option makes the decision for you. But I'd also want to get out because of what you said about the Mom....I'd know how she'd feel to have her own space occupied by someone else. It's not a feeling of anger toward the ones who have no choice, simply a drastic change in a blink of an eye.

Long story short, they need not be ashamed and their parents should be commended for a great deed. :D
 

Donal

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There is no way they should be shamed in anyway what so ever.
I would do everything for my daughter (yes, even move back in to my parents house if necessary) and I wouldn't give a s**t what anyone else thought.

Good on them, and happy to hear that your neice has got over the worst of it :thumb:

Don
 

djwilbanks

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We moved back in with my parents for a year or so... just couldn't keep going on what we had... my wife was pregnant, I was in and out of the hospital and couldn't keep going to my job or to college with any regularity because of that.

Finally moved back out, but if my parents hadn't been there then there's no telling what would have happened. As much as I hated having to move back in it was worth it for my family.
 

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