The Valor of a Ball Turret Gunner

FrankieOliver

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My ball turret gunner takes flak and not only remains at his station through the completion of the mission, but lives to tell his tale and fight another day.


Just after I’d completed an exhausting 40 minute Power 90 workout late yesterday afternoon, I suddenly noticed that my groin area was unusually damp. I made haste to the privy, dropped my drawers and discovered the source of this out of the ordinary, wet sensation. Much to my surprise, the entire crotch and taint area of my white boxers was stained scarlet red. The inside of my thighs near to the groin was also bloodied. Hmm? That's not good Thought I. I immediately looked to my bloody scrotum and the source from whence it came: “Quite a bleeder here.” I announced as I placed the tip of my right index finger over it to slow the bleeding. Frau Bek came running in to see what the matter. “That pair’s history,” she said.
“What?” says I.
“Those boxers,” she replies.
“You do see that I’ve got bigger problems, don’t you?”
“Oh…what are you going to do?”
“How about you put your finger on it while I come up with a plan?”

Frau Bek did this while I discerned a plan and after only a minute I asked her to remove her fnger. The blood continued to flow out again. “I may have to quarterize this,” I said.
“How?” asked Frau Bek.
“Remove your finger and go fetch my soldering iron from my workbench.”
“That’ll hurt – you’ll pass out. Besides, it’s probably not a good idea,” stated she quite matter of factly.
“I suppose your right…with my luck…”
“No, with my luck,” she replied.
“So, what am I going to do? It isn’t stopping. It must be the aspirin.”
“I’ve got an idea."

After ten minutes, I dropped my drawers again to see if the bleeding had stopped. It had, thank goodness. The tampon had worked.

:D
 

coldsteal2

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Yea they started carrying tampons around
they are perfect for bullet holes
 

Engel

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quick clot works well, just don't use the recalled stuff because the clotting agent will travel through your bloodstream and clot places you dont want it to.
 

KSG_Standard

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What caused the "leak"? I've never worked out so hard that my scrotum started leaking...you might be doing something wrong?
 

FrankieOliver

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What caused the "leak"? I've never worked out so hard that my scrotum started leaking...you might be doing something wrong?
Angiomas on the blood vessels, which are quite normal in middle-aged men. They do, on rare occasions, rupture.
 

KSG_Standard

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I've never heard of Angiomas, but I'll tell you this...if my sack ever starts leaking, ANY fluids, I'm on my way to the hospital. Glad you survived, I would have been traumatized.
 

Phil47uk

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For God's sake don't let Cookie read this thread. It's bad enough having to worry about him shitting himself on stage let alone complaining of Angiomas.
 

b-squared

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Just what I wanted to read with my first morning cuppa...

:D

BB
 

Cookie-boy

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For God's sake don't let Cookie read this thread. It's bad enough having to worry about him shitting himself on stage let alone complaining of Angiomas.

Too late I've read it!!

I've had one myself. Matron came home one day with a flat packed exercise bike and ordered me to assemble it. It got me so stressed and I had sweated myself into such a lather trying to get the rubber grip onto the handlebar that suddenly my nose (the fleshy bit at the end) started spraying a fountain of blood. Nothing could stop the bastard and I had to go down the docs and get it welded over!!:laugh2::laugh2:
 

C Squared

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I'm wincing in pain for ya as I'm reading this :shock:
 

Phil47uk

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All that excersise stuff isn't for me..I take my dogs out every day. That's good enough for me. :laugh2:
 

nick1962

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A very vascular area, hence the haemorrhage. Get yourself a diathermy kit for future emergencies!
 

circusboy28

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All I can say is that I'm glad that walking is the only vertical exercise that I undertake.
 

FrankieOliver

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That Power 90 Workout is unbelievable for anyone who isn't vertically challenged. Just two weeks ago, I was a solid 215 pounds. This morning I weighed in at 205 (first time I'm under 210 in a few years). Not only is the weight pouring off, but I feel absolutely wonderful. Gotta love those endorphines. :dude:
 

tw1st40

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Oh fuck so this is what i have to look forward to in 20 years?

I was blissfully ignorant up until this point!
 

JonMan94

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crying.gif
 

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