Stupid Sports Injuries

Sinmastah

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I thought some people might like a good 'ol laugh. So here you guys are

Catcher: Mickey Tettleton (Detroit Tigers) – Went on the DL with athlete’s foot…caused by tying his shoes too tight.

· First Base: George Brett (Kansas City Royals) – Broke his toe on a chair at home while running for the kitchen to the TV to watch Bill Buckner hit.

· Second Base: Jeff Kent (San Francisco Giants) – Claimed he hurt his wrist while washing his truck. Rumor has it that he was injured doing motorcycle stunts instead.

· Shortstop: Clint Barmes (Colorado Rockies) – Barmes had a strong Rookie of the Year campaign until he broke his collarbone…carrying deer meat.

· Third Base: Wade Boggs (Boston Red Sox) – Hurt himself…while putting on his cowboy boots.

· Outfield: Vince Colman (St. Louis Cardinals) – Missed the entire 1985 World Series…after being run over by Busch Stadium’s tarp machine.

· Outfield: Ken Griffey, Jr. (Seattle Mariners) – No stranger to injury, Griffey once missed a game after suffering a pinched testicle from his protective cup.

· Outfield: Rickey Henderson (Toronto Blue Jays) – Missed several games because of frostbite…in August…caused by falling asleep on an ice pack.

· Designated Hitter: Glen Allen Hill (Toronto Blue Jays) – One of the most painful, Hill went on the DL after suffering cuts caused by crashing through a glass table while dreaming that he was being attacked by spiders.


· Bench: Oddibe McDowell (Texas Rangers) – Sliced open his hand at a Texas welcome home luncheon while buttering a roll.

· Bench: Kevin Mitchell (New York Mets) – Taken out by a microwaved donut. I have no idea how this happened.

· Bench: Terry Harper (Atlanta Braves) – Separated his shoulder while waving a teammate home and subsequently high fiving him.

· Bench: Sammy Sosa (Chicago Cubs) – Missed a game after throwing out his back…while sneezing.

· Bench: Jose Cardenal (Chicago Cubs) – Missed a game in 1974 because he couldn’t blink.


· John Smoltz (Atlanta Braves) – Once burned his chest while ironing a shirt…while he was still wearing it.

· Nolan Ryan (Houston Astros) – Missed a start after being bitten on his hand…by a coyote.

· Jake Peavy (San Diego Padres) – Fractured a rib after he jumped into a celebratory pile after the Padres clinched the division.

· Carlos Perez (Montreal Expos) – Broke his nose in a car accident…while trying to pass the team bus.

· Adam Eaton (San Diego Padres) – Stabbed himself in the stomach while tearing off the wrapper on a DVD.

· Swingman: Dwight Gooden (New York Mets) – Missed a start when Vince Coleman accidentally took him out with a golf club in the clubhouse.

· Middle reliever: Steve Sparks (Milwaukee Brewers) – Dislocated his shoulder…while attempting to tear a phone book in half.

· Middle Reliever: Mark Smith (Baltimore Orioles) – Injured his hand…while sticking it into an air conditioner to see why it wasn't working.

· Middle reliever: Charlie Hough (Texas Rangers) – Once broking his pinky…while pinking shaking.

· Middle reliever: Ricky Bones (Florida Marlins) – Missed time in 2000 after injuring himself…while changing channels on the clubhouse TV.

· Setup Man: Greg Harris (Texas Rangers) - suffered a strained elbow flipping sunflower seeds while sitting in the bullpen

· Closer: Jason Isringhausen (Oakland Athletics) – Broke his hand while punching a trashcan, just weeks after stabbing himself in the leg trying to open a package.

Manager - Roger Craig (San Francisco Giants)

Cut his hand…while undoing a bra strap. Awesome.


· Catcher: Brent Mayne (Arizona Diamondbacks): Went on the disabled list in 2004 after straining his back…while unpacking clothes. Also strained his back in 2002…while turning his head to check traffic as he crossed the street.

· First Base: Ryan Klesko (Atlanta Braves): Once overexerted himself and pulled a muscle ... while picking up his lunch tray.

· Second Base: Bret Barberie (Florida Marlins): Missed a game after rubbing chili juice in his eye.

· Shortstop: Jason Bartlett (Minnesota Twins): Tore the nail off his left pinky…while sliding his hand under the television in his room at the Ritz Carlton hotel in Detroit.

· Third Base: Paul Molitor (Milwaukee Brewers): Dislocated a knuckle…when it got stuck in another player's glove.

· Outfielder: Marty Cordova (Baltimore Orioles): Missed a game after burning his face…after spending too much time under a tanning lamp.

· Outfielder: Dustan Mohr (Minnesota Twins): Strained his groin… while trying to get out of the dugout for a celebration for another player's home run.

· Outfielder: Tony Gwynn (San Diego Padres): Missed several games because he smashed his finger in the door of his luxury car.

Bench

· Bench: Kevin Mitchell (San Francisco Giants): Strained a muscle…while vomiting. He’s made both teams.

· Bench: Dave Nilsson (Milwaukee Brewers): Was stung by a mosquito in Australia, which then developed into the debilitating Ross River Fever. Was listed on the DL as "rare mosquito-born disease".

· Bench: Kent Hrbek (Minnesota Twins): Sprained an ankle wrestling with a clubhouse attendant, forcing him to miss the final ten days of the season.

· Bench: Jose Cardenal (Chicago Cubs): Also makes the second team, after he missed a game because he was kept awake all night by crickets chirping in his hotel room.


· Tom Glavine (Atlanta Braves) – Broke a rib in 1992…after vomiting up airplane food.

· Rich Harden (Oakland Athletics) – strained his shoulder…while turning off his alarm clock.

· Phil Niekro (Atlanta Braves) – Injured his hand…while shaking hands.

· Carlos Zambrano (Chicago Cubs) – Diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome…after spending too much time online.

· David Cone (New York Yankees) – Missed a start after his mother-in-law’s Jack Russell Terrier bit him.

· Swingman: Terry Mulholland (Minnesota Twins) – Went on the DL after scratching his eye…on a feather that was sticking out of a pillow.

· Middle Reliever: Randy Veres (Florida Marlins) – Injured his hand…after pounding it against a hotel room wall, trying to get the people in the next room to shut up.

· Middle Reliever: Larry Anderson (San Diego Padres) – Strained a rib muscle…while getting out of a Jacuzzi.

· Middle Reliever: Clarence Blethen (Boston Red Sox): Took out his false teeth because he thought he looked older and meaner. However, he forgot to put them back in his mouth when he was batting. While sliding into second base to break up a double play, he literally bit himself in the ####.

· Middle Reliever: Jeff Juden (Philadelphia Phillies) – Missed a start…because a tattoo he got before the season opener became infected.

· Middle Reliever: Mike Remlinger (Chicago Cubs) – Missed 15 days because of a broken pinky…that he broke in a recliner.

· Setup Man: Randy Flores (St, Louis Cardinals) – Went on the DL after taking off his socks…and a large patch of skin.

· Closer: Byron McLaughlin (Seattle Mariners) – While practicing his windup, he cut his right hand…when it went through the mirror he was too close to.



My Favorite have to be the ironing shirt one, the bra strap, and the guy who missed the game because he couldn't blink.
 

kernelofwisdom

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Last year I broke my arm playing ping-pong. Sad, but true. Probably happened to John Wayne too.
 

dingo

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Makes me laugh sometimes when the sports announcer explains why someone is on the DL as I watch baseball. Thank god FOOTBALL season is coming. Some guy gets tackled, bruises his pinky, breaks a rib, and fractures his skull they just tape him back up and he runs back onto the field. None of this "cracked his knuckle and out for the whole season" foolishness.
 

Sinmastah

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Yeah, but you don't need to grip a bat, or throw a ball in football at every position. However Bret Favre did have a broken thumb and kept playing, that was impressive.
 

dingo

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· First Base: Ryan Klesko (Atlanta Braves): Once overexerted himself and pulled a muscle ... while picking up his lunch tray.

And yet they get payed millions of dollars every year. That must have been one hell of a lunch tray.
 

Sinmastah

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Yeah, these are pro atheletes and they strain muscles by doing simple stuff. That is why this is so funny.
 

rodneyk915

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A few years back Gus Frerotte quarterback for the Redskins gave himself a concussion after headbutting the wall after scoring a touchdown and had to leave the game.
 

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