Snarlene

BillB1960

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Ok first of all I had to google 'vaginisimus' so lord knows what's going to pop up on the google ads on this site now! :shock:

Second, I was really hoping for a happy ending for ol' Matt...alas...not to be.

Finally, well told sir! :thumb:
 

sonar1

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Y'know, I used to think Dostoyevsky had a way with words and depicting characters from the universal human condition that you just KNEW from real life.

Keep it up Robert, someday you too could die penniless, as a writer of Literature!:lol:

I think you've got what it takes.:hmm:
 

Kamen_Kaiju

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Y'know, I used to think Dostoyevsky had a way with words and depicting characters from the universal human condition that you just KNEW from real life.

Keep it up Robert, someday you too could die penniless, as a writer of Literature!:lol:

I think you've got what it takes.:hmm:

lol.

Good artists get rich.

GREAT Artists f**kin' STARVE!
 

Skintaster

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Wow! Great story as usual. :)

I will never understand why some men will allow themselves to be shackled to such women... Or tricked I guess... But it seems that there is almost ALWAYS a warning sign or two.

I don't care HOW good the sex (Initially anyway) is, it's just not worth it... And some guys just allow themselves to be treated like crap.
 

Roberteaux

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Robert you should know by now that to a married woman a single friend is
her worst nightmare. Once they are married things change big time. Stop and think about it. Would you like it if the wife ran around with her girl friends
and she had told you she'd be home by 10 and she''s not. You will naturally
worry. It's a whole new game of cards. If you get married you don't have the
freedom because you have the responsibility to her too if you say you will be
home you be home just like you would expect her to be home when she says
she will. Would you want you wife running around town with her single friends
until 4 am in the morning. It's about respect or the marriage will be history
soon. I don't go to bars (unless we are filling in for someone or I go to see
someone play). I'm low risk to their wives and they all like me a lot more then their friends that talk them into going to the bars drinking. A lot has to do with you being single and chasing after women which is normal but the wife doesn't want him anywhere need it and I understand it.

Robert it is more what you represented single, womanizer, and drinking.
The last 2 being the sticking points.

Bottom line when I call one of my married friends to go hunting and shooting
or the guys I jam with that are married their wives don't care one hoot. Why, because they now they are not going to get into trouble when they are
with me and will be home on time.

Bottom line here is Robert you are a HELL RAISER and they know it.:laugh2:

CW


CW, the next time you complain about the length of one of my posts, I will post a link to this thread, and here's why:

I write at length that is sometimes exhaustive, because I have found that without a lot of detail, one's reader jumps to all sorts of conclusions that are incorrect. Now, I am not saying you have me pegged wrong completely, at least as I am today... for I am indeed a rogue when I'm in the mood, and when I am in that kind of mood I am enough to scare the needles off a cactus. There's no way for me to lie about that, and so I wont. But you are wrong in an awful lot of ways because you figure you know the back story to this whole bit. Ordinarily I would let your remarks go uncorrected, but you are somebody I actually care about and so I simply must respond.

So this is not an angry retort, brother; if you were sitting here next to me, you would be able to tell I am cool enough, and am merely explaining things as they were-- and as they are. I speak to you with respect, but also with a little bit of force because you got me wrong. Now, if it offends you to be told that this is so, then so be it. Just means you never respected me anyway, even though you sometimes pretended to. Shame on you, if that's how it really is.

So here's how it really was: when Matt got married I was already married myself. I was, in fact, married for six years before him, and for twenty years total... and I still have a loving relationship with my ex and both of my step kids. When Snarlene decided it was time to make things tough for Matt and I as friends, it had nothing to do with me being the bad influence on him as you seem to believe I was. At that point in time I was a deputy sheriff, and if I wasn't home at night it was because I was out on patrol, working an extradition, working street crimes, or working whatever detail they had me doing. I worked for a smaller agency and wasn't subject to being stuck in some unit doing only the same damned thing forever, the way a big city cop would be. Instead, I played pretty much every position they had because they rotated our details every so often.

I didn't hang out in bars because I was a cop, and for obvious reasons cops only drink with other cops. So I was home when I wasn't on duty, and if I wasn't home, I was a few blocks away at Matt's house usually helping him wrench on something. He was one of my closest friends at the time... it hurt a lot to be run off like I was, and I am still pretty mad about it. Mad at him, too, if you want to know the truth. He just wasn't strong enough to get that shrew of his under control.

You didn't seem to notice me saying that I figured it would be cool for us to hang out in his garage to work on cars and stuff-- and that, my friend, was the extent of the of my waywardness when Matt first married that frump. I liked to work on mechanical things, especially Harleys. But we used to build cars, go-karts, and messed with all sorts of other fun stuff like that together. We once built a 93" Shovelhead stroker that blew every Harley in Volusia County off the road in its day. We were a couple of grease monkeys who just dug messing around with internal combustion havoc. We used to go to the range all the time, too. He was my only civilian buddy. The rest of my pals were all cops.

Now, Snarlene was this country bumpkin chick who was insecure about everybody-- not just me. She ran off ALL of his friends, I was just the last one to finally bail. And incidentally: don't pretend that there's no such thing as shrewish, horrible women who are cruel to their husbands. I'm not some little kid who doesn't know the score and neither are you. I've seen plenty of 'em over the years. Lots of women are a**holes, it ain't just the men. Chicks don't get an automatic walk with me. I might be chivalrous when it is righteous to be so, but I am never deceived by any girl-- not even when I am cutting her slack she doesn't deserve. I have a few girlfriends that I don't actually care about, but I am not mean to them. The boys who have really good, honest wives who are decent, kindly, and true to them-- they are the really big winners-- and don't you think I don't know it. But don't you be thinkin' that Snarlene represents that particularly rare and elusive breed of woman. She was a piece of crap. Period.

My ex tried to befriend Snarlene so that we could do things as couples, but fact is that Snarlene didn't want any friends but her own... and I might add that some of them were far less savory than you might think I am. She was rude as hell to the ex, with the reason prolly being the the ex was a professional-- a sergeant in the department of corrections with a college education-- and all little Snarlene could put up with were her fellow minimum wage, high school dropout, pregnant-at-fifteen peers because she always had to be the Big Boss in any game or she just wouldn't play. And nobody put the dog on around that woman, either-- she was just a jerk from square one.

Also recall this: Matt hadn't even seen me but a few times over a nine year period, and yet that woman made his life such a living hell that he didn't even sleep in his own house half the time because he'd have to put up with her nastiness and crappy behavior. I didn't make that so; it was how things were when he ran into me that night. Granted, when he ran into me I was out tomcatting-- my favorite hobby since I got rid of the last woman I will ever care for enough to put up with any crap out of-- but I didn't try and lead him astray. Instead, I just stood there and felt sorry for him. For being so stalwart and honorable as he was, he paid a very high price... Matthew is a decent, honorable man, and she should appreciated him for it. True blue, for real...

You also didn't seem to notice that I instantly ruled out the idea of him going to Daytona with me for some really serious fun. I was content to schmooze with the guy right there in Deland, except that his ol' lady had to make life rotten for him. You missed a lot of what I had to say, pal.

Mind you: she wasn't worried that he'd run off with some floozy. This guy couldn't get some in a Slovakian cathouse with a hundred dollar bill stapled to his forehead and three more in each hand. So who wants to blame him for checking out all the high-test babes running around that night? That boy was a loser when it came to the ladies, and that's why he married Snarlene to begin with. She was the only game in town, near as he could tell.

The reason Snarlene was able to locate him so easily that night is because he was an honest man who stuck to what he said he'd stick to. And he wasn't due home at ten o'clock, either. Supposedly, he told her that he'd be back at midnight. Just, she always kept him under pressure, always turning the screws another quarter inch each day, and the poor chooch had been whipped into a cringing dawg by her perpetually frowny face over the years. He was calling her because he wanted to touch base so she wouldn't be such a jerk as she might have been otherwise. It was our bad luck that he didn't know how to handle his ridiculous telephone.

He actually hated her guts, and I already gave you the proof of it. But I wasn't the reason he hated her. He hated her because she was a miserable, nasty woman who was always mean and disrespectful towards him, almost from Day One.

He was only still with her for his daughter. But Snarlene was such a total crabcake that he couldn't even make it for but six months after the fateful night at 1750 North. Did you notice that I said that even her parents told Matt they understood why he left her? This is a thing he told me the other day...

Now, after she made a fool out of him in front of everybody, I did try to get him to go to Daytona for a little bit of get-down time. But even then, Matthew-- always true-blue, even when it was stoopid-- decided not to push his luck.

As for myself: yeah, I am a dyed-in-the-wool hellraiser, but only when I want to be. I will retire after thirty years of government service in just 11 months, and I do submit that this isn't exactly the mark of a man with no discipline whatsoever. I made it because I know WTF I am doing, and even when I am breaking bad, I have things more or less under control... kinda. I won't say I haven't had the luck of ten cats over the years. I should have been killed about a dozen times that I can think of off hand.

For the most part, I hang out at home most of the time. I play my guitar anywhere from two to five hours a night, and am happy with nothing more than a Siamese cat as my only constant companion.... just, I do have my moments when I decide that it's time to go out and have some fun in the weird, weird night, and I've spent plenty of time red-eyed and rolling. Your boy has as much juju going as mojo, but in fact I do keep it under control most of the time. Every now and then, I just have to bust loose though. It's just my nature as a being. I am domesticable, but for just anybody. Takes a special girl to really get my attention for keeps. I've already been lied to by the best.

You boys who found yourself a loving, decent woman won the lottery and I hope you know it. By contrast, I have about a half dozen high-speed girlfriends that I mess with when I am in the mood, but they mean nothing to me. They're a bunch of floozies who might look hot, but outside of bed they are worthless users of other people. But just because I can't find anybody better doesn't mean that I don't know the damned difference, or that I disrespect women or am a misogynist. Those girls are what they figure they have to be to get along. And I am good to them.

And I ain't no pied piper who leads my buddies to ruin. The reason I presented Snarlene as being the Wicked Witch of West Volusia is because that is what she really and truly is... an evil, bossy, misanthropic, selfish crone. I'd like to drive a wooden stake through her head and bury her at a crossroads during a New Moon, but there's laws against that sort of thing down here... :laugh2:


--R
 

cwness

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Robert I apologies if you took that I was speaking of you I wasn't. I was
talking in general of married women and what they think about their
husbands single friends. Sorry If you thought I meant you furthest thing
from my mind but you are a single Hell Raiser. When I was married the
ex would always have stories of how the women she worked with husband
would get into trouble and it most often or not it was with a single firend.
I've earned dull status for the reason I posted above. I don't know if it's a good thing or bad. I was in away agreeing with you. Just pointing out the
womens side from what I heard from the ex. You were being Robert and I
would expect no less. Short and Sweet Your the fun guy that women will
be jealous of. I''m the dull guy they have no worries about.:laugh2:

Peace

CW
 

Roberteaux

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Robert I apologies if you took that I was speaking of you I wasn't. I was
talking in general of married women and what they think about their
husbands single friends. Sorry If you thought I meant you furthest thing
from my mind but you are a single Hell Raiser. When I was married the
ex would always have stories of how the women she worked with husband
would get into trouble and it most often or not it was with a single firend.
I've earned dull status for the reason I posted above. I don't know if it's a good thing or bad. I was in away agreeing with you. Just pointing out the
womens side from what I heard from the ex. You were being Robert and I
would expect no less. Short and Sweet Your the fun guy that women will
be jealous of. I''m the dull guy they have no worries about.:laugh2:

Peace

CW

Ah, CW-- no apology whatsoever was necessary; instead, please accept mine for having so misunderstood you...

I do know what you mean about single friends being a source of trouble for married couples... really do, and have even seen it.

Really, I need to get my head out of my ass sometimes. Tonight, that's how I feel. I hope you didn't take any offense at my words, even as I took none at yours, really.

I guess I'm a little sensitive because I really feel like I lost one of my best friends for no good reason at all. But I should not have bathed you in the awesome butthurt of it all. That wasn't fair, and so again I must apologize.

Thank you for the courtesy of your reply; I am very relieved.

Your buddy,
Robert
 

cwness

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Hey Robert

Sometimes I right thing and they just don't come out like I had planned.
Oh by the way I should add that the ex would tell them why are you blaming
the friend it's your hubby who should no better and if he says he'll call
he should call. The wives would still stay the single instigated them and she
say so your husband can't say no I have to get home. They gots to have someone to blame. Just sit here taken it easy and playing guitar.

CW
 

jlu52

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Robert, you are very gifted. I was locked in, absolutely mesmerized from the first word. Drama, belly laughs, reality plus a shitload more, plus where else am I gonna get "self induced vaginismus"? Most of us, with time and experience, have had the misfortunes of a Snarlene or two in our midst, and certainly within our periphery. As always, looking forward to your first novel.....
 

Roberteaux

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Keep it up Robert, someday you too could die penniless, as a writer of Literature!

:lol:

Well, it ain't for nothin' that I am dying to get past these next eleven slowpoke months so I can collect on my 30 and go into hot pursuit of a sullen muse. That pension will at least make it possible for me to sit around hammering on a keyboard all day without starving to death, and without having to worry about actually being successful. But I know that if I am to do this thing right, it has got to be a full-time kind of thing. Meanwhile, I will have my guitar to help me decompress after a long day of ranting and raving... ;)

Can't wait to empty my head of all the crap it's stuffed with. Been living with it all for too-too long! :laugh2:

...plus where else am I gonna get "self induced vaginismus"?

Guess I could always introduce you to Snarlene... she's single these days... :laugh2:

Thank you for the compliment, 52. It's encouraging to me that you seem to have enjoyed the tell of it. Really, I only hope to entertain...

--R :)
 

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