Need to vent

[EDS1275]

see, this is why i never married or had kids.... too great of a mental burden

 

[Hack]

Wow.

 

[Howard2k]

see, this is why i never married or had kids.... too great of a mental burden

And the chicks didn't dig the third arm?

 

[EDS1275]

And the chicks didn't dig the third arm?

dude, thats just cruel. i was born with a third arm. you have no idea how much i was laughed at in school. i became a professional juggler. now who's laughing, huh

 

[solteroblues]

my whole life could be a dr Phil show, or more likely, Jerry Springer, almost all due to my wife's antics.

Fortunately, the mortgage was only like 1/3 of what ours is, a little more than my car payment, but I know we'll never recoup that. She was going to ask her mom to come up with half of it so we could get at least that much back, but her sister is going through a nasty divorce situation with her white trash husband who hasn't worked a job in about 10 years and all he does all day is do drugs and steal stuff. He's already broken into her house, and he's a registered sex offender

 

[VictorB]

Some people are addicted to drama.

And can't live a "normal" life without it.

And when there isn't any going on, they'll seek it out.

 

[Sct13]

Many families are taking care of dad and mom...I have an uncle and his wife that I shelter, Talk about stress....And yes it is a strain on you and the family.

Really? looked for an apartment for you and him? Maybe you should look for an apartment for her and that vampire "friend."

At this point you need to take a passive stand, your nest for your children is of utmoast importance, food and health PERIOD...An outside is trying to worm her way into a comfortable life.

Shut down the accounts. All of them, and YOU make the choice who is staying and who is going. If your wife sees value in her family she will see it and come to her senses. If not then you may be happier.

Also people who are vampires are evil, they whisper crap to make you look bad and try to weaken you in the eyes of the ones they manipulate. She is chewing away at the very foundation of your childerens home. Your Life.

Your reaching out for help, go and get it...

 

[Drew224]

I'd start looking for a lawyer.

 

[EDS1275]

a friend of mine lent his sister in law and her husband 75k to go into business or something.... never happened...never repaid. very uncomfortable to be around each other obviously. friends wife (her sister) told him to never bring it up (as it would cause strife). oh well indeed

 

[solteroblues]

funny you mention vampire, she used to be into devil worship and she really likes Twilight and all of that crap - even though she's supposed to be a Christian now...but she still talks about witchcraft and stuff.

I know I need to confront my wife about it, but she only sees my comments as threats no matter the intent. Usually, she's already moved on to another project by now, and they have had at least 2 big fights where they almost called it quits, but somehow they keep getting back together.

 

[EDS1275]

turn lemons into lemonaide. write comedy script versions of whats happening and you may have yourself another married with children type hit!

 

[solteroblues]

And, just to be clear... I didn't come here looking for answers, just to vent, but I REALLY appreciate all of the help and support you guys are offering. I don't really have any friends that I can vent like this to, so this helps just being able to spew my frustrations.

 

[EDS1275]

dr phil would probably say this is all perhaps an expression of symptoms within your marriage?

 

[Hack]

And, just to be clear... I didn't come here looking for answers, just to vent, but I REALLY appreciate all of the help and support you guys are offering. I don't really have any friends that I can vent like this to, so this helps just being able to spew my frustrations.

I'm glad you arent seeking advice, I wouldnt know where to begin!

Good luck to you.

 

[Strato]

My wife seems to like to take on projects, as in make friends with low life white trash.

I'm not judging here.

 

[LongBeach]

IMO: You know way to much about this persons for her being a casual friend of
your wife, who she hasn't known that long.

Tell your wife to kick this chick to the curb, she's trouble,
and, she's dragging your family down the toilet.

Giving her $ to pay her mortgage? F-that, being nice is one thing, being a "sucker"
is another. I don't mean that in a negative way, but, this lady seems to be using your wife. Just and opinion, but, when someone quits their job for literally no good reason, with no back-up job waiting, that's an irresponsible parent. IMO

 

[ErictheRed]

I think that you should sit down with your wife and try to have a conversation about what she wants, what would make her happier, etc. Maybe with a counselor of some kind. As someone who's been through a divorce (shittiest thing in the world), it sounds like the two of you might be drifting apart.

Sounds like your wife wants to feel more important than she currently does. Reassure her how important she is to you, but maybe she wants some kind of job as well? She could start down a career leading to becoming a social worker or something similar.

I dunno, don't mean to jump into your business, just saying that if someone doesn't feel important in their life, bad times are ahead...

 

[solteroblues]

they've been friends for about 8 months I guess...I know too much because that's all my wife ever talks to me about, is what's going on in this other person's life, that and she is here almost every day when I get home, and if not, is on her way over.

I know, the white trash comment is very judgmental, but it does fit. Both cases have been freeloaders with questionable judgment and histories, with no real effort at getting better, other than leeching off of us. I mean you quit a job that pays you money for sitting still and listening to lectures? What college kid wouldn't love to get paid while sitting in class? Especially if it means you could lose your house? It's already been foreclosed on once, and her parents got it back for her. She never gets child support from the deadbeat dad, until he joined the service a couple of months ago and they forced him to pay like $7k in back child support. What did she do with the money? Nothing that I can tell, spent it all on cigarettes and eating out all of the time. She didn't do a single thing to fix her car, which only has 2 working seat belts, or pay her mortgage or any utilities with it. She was just complaining about having to sit in the dark waiting on them to foreclose until my wife so graciously paid the mortgage. Oh yeah, she did buy a $250 aquarium to put a couple of turtles in - which also stink. If I couldn't afford to feed my family, I sure wouldn't be buying aquariums and more pets. She already has 2 dogs that do all of their business inside the house, even though she has a fenced in back yard.

We already pay the trash collection every month so she can't blame that for piling up garbage on the floor. I personally helped clean up that dumpster she lives in, cleaning all of the dried poop off of the floor, sometimes on my hands and knees with rubber gloves and a plastic knife. I still can't stand to come close to going inside because it still smells like the dog shit that soaked into everthing. We gave her our old couch and tables when we bought a new living room suite, but it's already ruined with dog crap that's dried into the cushions. I refuse to eat anywhere near her - especially at her house, where I won't even go inside anymore.

It is sad, but none of these issues couldn't be fixed without money or by even saving it. Open the door and take the dogs outside. Quit spending $30 on every meal going out to eat instead of buying food and cooking at home - although I could never eat it.

 

[Kamen_Kaiju]

sounds like a bad situation.

This is how divorces get started.

Good luck man.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychic_vampire

 

[Hack]

Dont be afraid to judge.

We all do. Its how we make the appropriate decisions most times.