Must....Kill....Cardinal

[Meatwad]

I've got a bird that's got it in for me and my car.
It's bad enough that the mother****er bombs my windows from sunup to sunset, but I digress.....
I posted about him a while back.
http://www.mylespaul.com/forums/backstage/365350-nice-quiet-morning.html

Ever since that day he got into my car, he's been trying to get back in.
I can't leave my windows cracked open more than an inch or so now on hot days. (Black car inside and out)
Every day he sh!ts on my door - the same exact spot on the driver's door.
Every ****ing day.
I walk out the back door and I see a red streak fly away.....and then I see the poop.

I just washed my car today.
I came home just long enough to run in and grab a few things....maybe I was inside for two minutes.
That's how long it takes for that little incontinent ****face to decorate my ride.

I guess he's been eating lots of berries....it's been a real pretty purple color.

I have no other choice other than to plant a bomb in my car and blow it up with him at this point.

 

[parts]

..dam...I thought you were going all out anti catholic clergy..

 

[Brians Evil Twin]

Put one of those plastic owls on the car for a few days....

 

[chasenblues]

 

[Cruznolfart]

Visual bird scare products like flash tape, screech owls, bird scare balloons can be effective bird control is combined with audio and visual bird deterrents.

 

[redcoats1976]

im guessing you drive a firebird?

 

[JTM45]

Lol, a birdecutioner

 

[kevinpaul]

Eat what you kill! Song birds are yummy, rye bread and a dash of mayo. I had a Blue Jay last night and it was so good. I didn't even cook it, yep feathers and all.

 

[THDNUT]

Buy a garage.

 

[Meatwad]

Buy a garage.

A scope for my .22 would be cheaper.

I'd triple tap that sh!tbird.

 

[chasenblues]

I've got a bird that's got it in for me and my car.

I guess he's been eating lots of berries....it's been a real pretty purple color.

 

[sk8rat]

since they are stupid enough to think their reflections are another bird get some stuffed ones electrify them and then when it goes in for the attack it will be shocked and forfeit its territory.

 

[LtDave32]

Put one of those plastic owls on the car for a few days....

Perfect solution.

My dear ol' pop used to love to grow his tomatoes in the front yard. Bumper crop, they were. Awesome tomatoes.

Then the friggin' crows caught sight of them and promptly destroyed half the crop or better.

Until one day, a neighbor advised him to put a rubber snake in the tomato bed.

Now, me and a girl happened to be going to Disneyland, taking her daughter for the first time. So, we stopped into "Jungle Land", where they had entire baskets full of rubber snakes.

I bought three of them.

Distributed them around dad's tomato crop.

From then on, all the crows would do is strut back and forth on the driveway like Fred Sanford.

Not a tomato molested for evermore.

 

[LtDave32]

For that matter, you could probably just put a cat stuffy toy on top of the car and achieve the same result.

You are getting even, don't worry. You are denying the little bastard his hell-bent mission to ruin your life.

 

[LtDave32]

Eat what you kill! Song birds are yummy, rye bread and a dash of mayo. I had a Blue Jay last night and it was so good. I didn't even cook it, yep feathers and all.

Kevin, something tells me here that you just might be telling a fib.

 

[Meatwad]

A co-worker told me that he had a similar problem and tried the plastic owl thing with no luck.

I dunno......I bet something outta this would do the trick.

 

[Benjammin]

Acme: where the pros go

 

[chasenblues]

For that matter, you could probably just put a cat stuffy toy on top of the car and achieve the same result.

 

[Harmony]

Fake owl or snake.

Or something that birds are scared of. Either that or park down the road


At least you do not have mockingbirds attacking you or your dog. Every year I get it. They nest in my bush outside and take over my yard.

They are noisy gits too.

 

[chasenblues]

Fake owl or snake.

Or something that birds are scared of.