Elon Musk Presents: Tom Cruise in space! Tom Cruise dies... in space!


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Oct 13, 2007
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So: beats Sean Penn in a rowboat?

Discuss if you will...


And people need to stop using 'literally' in all their blather, proving they are illiterate.

Say goodbye to Tom Cruise, everybody. It’s just a matter of time now before his frozen body is left drifting off into the unknown, an eternal testament to the folly of man and our species’ constant hunger for bigger and bolder movie stunts. Future generations will look upon him in awe, wondering why such a handsome 50-something-year-old man was released from the gentle caress of Mother Earth’s gravity and left to float alone like a discarded plastic bag in the endless black ocean of eternity. We’ll be long gone by then, forgotten by the pages of history ourselves, but we will still know the answer to that question. Only we will remember what happened to Tom Cruise, how he based his belief system around some interesting concepts, and how he dedicated his life to the most noble of all professions. He was a movie star, and he died in space making a movie. Look on his works, ye mighty, and jump up on Oprah’s couch.

I can’t deny that it’s fun to imagine such an utterly insane and uncalled-for production — though picturing this is probably the closest it will come to reality. That is, it will never fucking happen. Maybe it’s just a silly pet peeve, but frankly, I’m getting tired of these announcements from an industry that has been suspended for who knows how long.

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