Corey the North Lander: God of Rock or Canadian Corey: Lumberjack of Rock

djwilbanks

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No, I'm saying he should tap the potential of others.
 

weirdotis

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"As Corey descends to the Crossroads, remnants of Robert Johnson in a bag slung over his back..."
 

Mr Insane

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I can't believe I missed this epic thread.
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There, playing in front of thousands of fellow AARP members, was Pete Townshend. Supplementing his frantic stage antics and guitar smashing with an obscene wardrobe malfunction;letting his belly hang out of his shirt.

Using his new powers of persuasion, Corey was able to get past the security guards who would have slapped him for fun. He pulled out of his pocket a grenade. Screaming "I am finishing what should happened at the Smother Brother's show!" He then threw the messenger of death, blowing Pete's guts into the horrified crowd.

Just before putting on a pair of sunglasses, Corey uttered "Looks like there won't be a encore."
 

jomo

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Coreh.jpg
 

fatb0t

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He's just a kid man, cut him some slack. Not everyone knows who they are in high school. Most people are fake and think its comes across genuine, I mean, Corey must know it's an act of sorts. haha
 

djwilbanks

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Umm... have you seen him lately? :rofl: Nothing that's been done in this thread can rival what he has done to himself.
 

LtDave32

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Imagine what it's like for a relative newcomer such as myself to wander in here and read about this guy.. I read somewhere that this dude claimed to have found a 1964 Les Paul in an attic?

Wait a sec..

1964 Les Paul? :hmm:

I've become strangely curious as to what makes a guy who would make such a ridiculous statement tick.. I've found myself lost in the archives, finding more and more ridiculous s**t issued from this guy.. Does anyone have the link to the "1964" :laugh2: Les Paul story, the one from the OP?

I was up until 2:30 am last night reading about such epic fails such as "Ledlover", "LP068", etc..

Nothing short of fascinating.. I'm no stranger to forums, and I've never encountered anything close to the BS that goes on here.. Highly entertaining BS, though. I laughed so hard last night I almost fouled my shorts..

How 'bout the thread where LP08's "dad" came on and straightened a few things out? I'd love to see that. :lol:
 

Boleskinehouse

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Most of those threads were sent to the dump... They've been brought out a few times for entertainment, but most of the good stuff was outright deleted. They don't exist in their original, extremely awesome form anymore. :laugh2:
 

jeff_farkas

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Most of those threads were sent to the dump... They've been brought out a few times for entertainment, but most of the good stuff was outright deleted. They don't exist in their original, extremely awesome form anymore. :laugh2:

I loved LL's first posts about his house and boat. WOW that was a load. :D
 

dubyatf

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Imagine what it's like for a relative newcomer such as myself to wander in here and read about this guy.. I read somewhere that this dude claimed to have found a 1964 Les Paul in an attic?

Wait a sec..

1964 Les Paul? :hmm:

I've become strangely curious as to what makes a guy who would make such a ridiculous statement tick.. I've found myself lost in the archives, finding more and more ridiculous s**t issued from this guy.. Does anyone have the link to the "1964" :laugh2: Les Paul story, the one from the OP?

I was up until 2:30 am last night reading about such epic fails such as "Ledlover", "LP068", etc..

Nothing short of fascinating.. I'm no stranger to forums, and I've never encountered anything close to the BS that goes on here.. Highly entertaining BS, though. I laughed so hard last night I almost fouled my shorts..

How 'bout the thread where LP08's "dad" came on and straightened a few things out? I'd love to see that. :lol:

"Destination MLP: You'll come for the characters - you'll stay for the short fouling"

:laugh2::laugh2:
 

Exluthier

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Come on we got to have the theme music too!

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnrXiaPVeHY]YouTube - Queen - Princes Of The Universe[/ame]
 

LtDave32

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They seem to be better than legendary. Too bad they aren't preserved in some sort of "Hall of Fame" or some such corner of this forum.. Last night I was cackling uncontrollably, tears flowing from the outside corners of my eyes.. My fiancee even woke up and wondered what the hell I was on..

The more I comb the archives, the worse (better) it gets.. hell, I'm just going to sit on a bucket and hope for the best...
 

Boleskinehouse

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:laugh2::laugh2::dude: We've talked about the idea of creating a Hall of Shame.. No luck so far.
 

LtDave32

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:laugh2::laugh2::dude: We've talked about the idea of creating a Hall of Shame.. No luck so far.

Anything so entertaining simply can't be wrong. Let the people speak, put it to a vote. The silver lining to every epic fail is it's entertainment value.. Perhaps some of the language used in the dumped threads could be edited for prime-time..

Some of this is better than the s**t my hillbilly, trailer-trash neighbors pull..

-Remember Corey Feldman in "The Burbs".. ?
 

Thundergod

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Next up christians and jews should unite to bring Hendrix back from the other side, have him give Corey what for.

:thumb:
 

djwilbanks

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Next up christians and jews should unite to bring Hendrix back from the other side, have him give Corey what for.

:thumb:

I like the idea of resurrecting a dead guitar god to battle Corey. Even with all the combined powers of the greatest guitarists in history, could Corey defeat a corporeal manifestation of Jimi Hendrix's rock-god soul??

Stay tuned! :Ohno:
 

LtDave32

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So I was chatting with VastHorizon on Facebook and we got onto the subject of philosophy. I had this to say about Corey, philosophically speaking.

So we imagined an idea... that if Corey were to go around murdering rock's most influential guitarists, Corey would then increase in his ability to play guitar. So the following is work of fiction, proof on concept of that idea.
________________________________________________

It is an autumn night, a cool breeze blows through the trees as the distinctive sound of Carlos Santana carries over the crowd. Santana is ripping through the solo with unerring precision. His tone, as usual, made his loyal fans nostalgic for a time long-passed. Just then a sound unfamiliar to the crowd rang out. A missed note! Santana had missed the ending note to one of his famous solos when a hooded assassin ran him through with the headstock of one of his own PRS signature models.

"Ay dios mio...," sighed the rocker as he slumped to the ground.

As Santana lay bleeding on the stage, the hooded assassin stood before the crowd, "bow down to your master, Jesus of Suburbia himself! I AM COREY!"

Santana writhed in pain, but was able to bring himself to his feet, "I will not allow you to take my tone, Corey of Suburbia."

"I am sorry, old friend. I must do this, for the girl I hang out with demands that I become a better guitarist. And you know what you must do if you wish to play Carnegie Hall."

Santana pulled the PRS free from his body and spit blood before responding, "Practice?"

"MURDER!"

Corey set himself upon his aging adversary. Santana valiantly defended himself, but he had lost too much blood. Corey was able to over power the feeble guitarist/bongo player and tossed him into one of the half-stacks which shorted out and caught on fire. As Santana was engulfed in flames, Rob Thomas, off stage, said "like seven inches from a mid-day sun." As roadies came to put out Santana's flaming body, he fell into the crowd which carried his charred corpse away like one, final crowd surf.
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DjWillbanks, That is simply outstanding! I normally stick to the build threads, but this is the funniest crap I've read in the last year. :lol:

I want more. Much, much more! Someone pass a link along to LP068's threads? ..Or the thread where the guy lies about a house and a boat, and his dad comes on to square things away?.. That's gotta be comedy gold..
 

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