Band Drama

splatter

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So after 3 years of looking we finally found a singer. Shes smoking hot and really good.We are about 1/2 way there with the song list and decided to fire the drummer .
Why you ask , well because he plays in 2 other bands and its causing conflicts with our practice schedule. That alone may not have done it but when confronted about it his reply was always " fire me if you want to but you're not gonna find a drummer of my caliber and I don't have time for your girl drama".He was a good drummer but played everything to fast, IMHO that kills the grove of the song .
So in the last 2 weeks we have had probably 5 drummers contact us about our add.They all play in other bands. A couple were in original bands that hardly ever practice or gig. The other guitar player in the band was completely against taking anyone who plays in other bands and we even turned one guy away because he coached football.So yesterday I tell him we need to change the whole "can't play in other band's thing or we are never gonna find a drummer ".
So yesterday when the old drummer comes to pick up his drums he ask him to come back.
IMO this is a big mistake because the other drummer now has a major attitude, he told me he hates the other guitar plalyer. Also I think we could do better and while we have the add out and have some other contacts why not try someone else who doesn't have an attitude. BTW we also fired the bass player for the same reason a week earlier and he is the other guitar players brother. He also was out of town alot and was a really big ass hole. We replaced him but now that bass player decided he Is to busy to be in a band.
we have another bass player lined up to audition but he is out on vacation for the next week .
This kind of shit is why I quit gigging 20 years ago .

Here is a shameless plug for the " would be band ", I'm the one with the sunglasses and snakeskin head . There is a montage of some songs on there . Its practice recordings so don't expect to much . I play all the leads btw . https://www.facebook.com/VDCoyoteMusic/
 

DavGrape

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Good drumming a fine art, for sure.
I got a good guy, but he too fast, too loud, and tone deaf. Hhahaha!
 

Frogfur

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So after 3 years of looking we finally found a singer. Shes smoking hot and really good.We are about 1/2 way there with the song list and decided to fire the drummer .
Why you ask , well because he plays in 2 other bands and its causing conflicts with our practice schedule. That alone may not have done it but when confronted about it his reply was always " fire me if you want to but you're not gonna find a drummer of my caliber and I don't have time for your girl drama".He was a good drummer but played everything to fast, IMHO that kills the grove of the song .
So in the last 2 weeks we have had probably 5 drummers contact us about our add.They all play in other bands. A couple were in original bands that hardly ever practice or gig. The other guitar player in the band was completely against taking anyone who plays in other bands and we even turned one guy away because he coached football.So yesterday I tell him we need to change the whole "can't play in other band's thing or we are never gonna find a drummer ".
So yesterday when the old drummer comes to pick up his drums he ask him to come back.
IMO this is a big mistake because the other drummer now has a major attitude, he told me he hates the other guitar plalyer. Also I think we could do better and while we have the add out and have some other contacts why not try someone else who doesn't have an attitude. BTW we also fired the bass player for the same reason a week earlier and he is the other guitar players brother. He also was out of town alot and was a really big ass hole. We replaced him but now that bass player decided he Is to busy to be in a band.
we have another bass player lined up to audition but he is out on vacation for the next week .
This kind of shit is why I quit gigging 20 years ago .

Here is a shameless plug for the " would be band ", I'm the one with the sunglasses and snakeskin head . There is a montage of some songs on there . Its practice recordings so don't expect to much . I play all the leads btw . https://www.facebook.com/VDCoyoteMusic/

The drummer me and my partner jam with plays in 5 different bands. But, he also make his entire living off of it.
 

fry

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I was only ever in one band, 25-ish years ago. A guy I was sort of friendly with invited me to jam with him and another guy he had been doing some acoustic stuff with. I was a drummer, had been trying to get another thing off the ground with my best friend, but it never happened. I accepted the invitation, and we became a band in pretty short order. These guys wrote a lot of their own stuff, the goal being a 50/50 mix of covers and originals. The third guy became our bass player. He also pretty much financed EVERYTHING because he had a real career and the other guy and I were broke. It got a little dicey eventually, because the bass player wanted to sing a lot of lead, and he was a terrible, terrible singer. We had to have the uncomfortable talk with him about no longer singing. He insisted on singing his own material, wouldn't budge. We needed his house and financial backing, so we had to accept. We weren't going to be rock stars anyway, so we tried to at least have fun.
 

meatball

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BTW , I play in two bands ,, I told the second band that my main project will always take first place and to Book around my gig schedule with them ,,,end of story ,, been first ever since , That is the way you need to present it to the drummer that comes in to join you , IF they cant understand that , then you will continue to have drama . Commitment is everything ,,
 

freebyrd 69

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Get used to it OP. It's ALWAYS hard to get 3, 4, 5 people on the same schedule with the same vision. The older you and the people in your band get, the harder it will be, as other things in life take over.

I have always said I'd rather have a good player with a GREAT attitude than a KILLER player that's a jerk. Sometimes you have to forego a little talent to get the right guy personality wise, because that's what will give you stability.

I checked out your FB page. So, like us, you are a cover band primarily/exclusively? The best thing to do is spend a fair amount of time talking to the potential players before you ever get together or play a single note with them. It doesn't matter how good someone is if their agendas don't match yours.

We gig once a month.....twice if something exceptional pops up. I have my daughter every other weekend and work a sh!t ton of hours. The Black Crowes could re-form tomorrow and ask me to be their guitarist and I would have to respectfully decline. LOL

I was asked to join the band I'm currently in after 1 audition. Prior to me playing, I had a long conversation with the other guitarist in the band explaining to him how often I could gig, practice, and everything else band related. We got all of that out of the way up front. My recommendation is to do that. It will save you and the others a ton of valuable time.

Even if you have to sound like a bit of a d!ck up front, lay it out there for potential members. THIS is what this band is about, THIS is how often we want to gig, THIS is the type of music we do, and THIS is our practice schedule. If ANY of this is a potential problem for you, let's get it out of the way before we both waste our time or play a note. Otherwise, you are just in for a bunch of fruitless (though maybe fun) jam sessions.

Also, establish a leader if you haven't already. Every band needs the Alpha Dog, the final decision maker, etc.. Again, try and remember, personality can outweigh talent to some degree if you want to put a lineup together that will last. If someone is just an arrogant prick, he's not worth it.

Good luck. The band sounds really good by the way!
 

marksoundguitars

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Drummers are a dime a dozen. Good drummers are a little harder to find. Musicians who happen to play drums are rare indeed.

My favorite drummer was a multi-instumentalist and could sing harmonies. When he locked into a groove, he was rock solid. Unfortunately, he left the band after three years for personal reasons. Our next drummer was solid, but not so great on the harmonies. Our song list changed to accommodate the loss of one harmony part, and that guy left after a year. After that we rotated drummers and could never get any of them to rehearse. The song list continued to shrink, from nearly a hundred tunes to just enough to get through a gig. A couple of years of that and the band fell apart.

Too bad, really. We were pretty decent. :/
 

Deus Vult

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Drummers aren't normal people.

The sound waves off the cymbals somehow cause brain damage. Being a drummer always results in several or all of the following:

Baby mommas /multiple marriages
Heavy drinking/drug use
Lack of transportation
Unemployment
Tardiness
Criminal history
General unreliability
 

Kamen_Kaiju

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Drummers aren't normal people.

The sound waves off the cymbals somehow cause brain damage. Being a drummer always results in several or all of the following:

Baby mommas /multiple marriages
Heavy drinking/drug use
Lack of transportation
Unemployment
Tardiness
Criminal history
General unreliability

you forgot bare feet. They love being barefoot,...actually they seem to have an aversion to clothes, period.

Good luck OP. Most drummers are in multiple "Projects". That's what they call being a band whore.

Once you're not a teenager though it's hard to keep a drummer around unless you're paying him to be there or bribing him with booze.
 

edro

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Just wait until one of the guys falls for the singer. This stuff will seem like pre-school on the drama scale.

Yep. She lasted only half way through the first gig... Dated the guitarist, I played keys and guitar in that one. We finished the gig without her and stayed together for a couple of years, made money.

I didn't even say bye bye to her. Glad she walked. Great singer, hot, and a royal pain in the ass. I gave that guitarist close lifelong bud hell for thirty years for getting her in the band and then dating her...

Bands I work with now (2), drama=gone ass...
To old for that kind of negativity in my life now...

I like my mates. One band is old studio type farts... Noshitsgiven type... Love working with that one especially....

Ain't worth the headache dealing with idiots.
:cool2:
 

Kamen_Kaiju

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seriously singers already have LSD

add female on top of that?

add hot female on top of that?

good lord.

0519d812b5b8f582869cb6ed720d14040d972-retina-thumbnail-large.jpg
 

SteveC

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Get used to it OP. It's ALWAYS hard to get 3, 4, 5 people on the same schedule with the same vision. The older you and the people in your band get, the harder it will be, as other things in life take over.

I have always said I'd rather have a good player with a GREAT attitude than a KILLER player that's a jerk. Sometimes you have to forego a little talent to get the right guy personality wise, because that's what will give you stability.

I checked out your FB page. So, like us, you are a cover band primarily/exclusively? The best thing to do is spend a fair amount of time talking to the potential players before you ever get together or play a single note with them. It doesn't matter how good someone is if their agendas don't match yours.

We gig once a month.....twice if something exceptional pops up. I have my daughter every other weekend and work a sh!t ton of hours. The Black Crowes could re-form tomorrow and ask me to be their guitarist and I would have to respectfully decline. LOL

I was asked to join the band I'm currently in after 1 audition. Prior to me playing, I had a long conversation with the other guitarist in the band explaining to him how often I could gig, practice, and everything else band related. We got all of that out of the way up front. My recommendation is to do that. It will save you and the others a ton of valuable time.

Even if you have to sound like a bit of a d!ck up front, lay it out there for potential members. THIS is what this band is about, THIS is how often we want to gig, THIS is the type of music we do, and THIS is our practice schedule. If ANY of this is a potential problem for you, let's get it out of the way before we both waste our time or play a note. Otherwise, you are just in for a bunch of fruitless (though maybe fun) jam sessions.

Also, establish a leader if you haven't already. Every band needs the Alpha Dog, the final decision maker, etc.. Again, try and remember, personality can outweigh talent to some degree if you want to put a lineup together that will last. If someone is just an arrogant prick, he's not worth it.

Good luck. The band sounds really good by the way!

Yup... well said Jon. Been there, done that, too! <sigh>
 

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