27 year old son , no job for 7 months now, hardly leaves his room playing video games

[TheX]

Unless it's Asia, then it's the Mandarin Oriental!

Yep, this is my room during my last trip to Kuala Lumpur. GREAT hotel. Basically at the bottom of the Petronas Towers. Real wood, and everything was perfect.

 

[SteveC]

Yep, this is my room during my last trip to Kuala Lumpur. GREAT hotel. Basically at the bottom of the Petronas Towers. Real wood, and everything was perfect.

View attachment 529795

Yessir!!!! I know it well. Stayed there several times myself, too.

 

[PeteK]

It's no Omni in Germany, but I guess it looks ok.

 

[Roberteaux]

The sounds of equality......


"Open it yourself........"

"Keep trying you can do it !!"

"Don't hurt yourself"

"What do you mean the lid is to tight?"

More sounds of true equality:

"Okay girls, listen: Mary, I want you to stay right here and lay down suppressive fire at the enemy machine gun crew with your M-60. At the same time I want half of 1st squad-- Karen, Josie, and Celina-- to hook left and try to use that small rise over there as defilade. Once you get there, you start in with the suppressive fire, but semi-auto only to spare ammunition. Just keep their heads down, okay?

...meanwhile, I need the other half of first squad-- Kitty, Teri, and Gibby-- to low crawl about 200 yards behind that rise over to the right. There should be some dead enemy lying around there because we just hit it with a mortar barrage, but be careful: some of 'em might still be alive and just playing dead, so don't hesitate to shoot any or all of them on the way into position. Better safe than sorry, okay?

Now girls, you see how the ridge tapers off at about 200 yards? Okay, that's also gonna put you three close enough to lob grenades into the enemy's position. Because the bastards have learned to throw grenades back the way they came, you guys are gonna need to cook the grenades off for about three seconds before throwing 'em... but stay down until it goes off because you're gonna get an air burst and it will be as easy for you to get fragged as the guys you're trying to kill-- you got that? And I know you've been asked to crawl there-- but I need you to make it as fast as is humanly possible okay?

Okay... everybody ready? Good luck, ladies-- let's go!"


LOL About the only women I can think of who would even understand any of that would be members of the Kurdish, Israeli, or Lebanese military, with maybe a handful of female guerillas scattered here and there throughout the globe...

--R

ETA: Female Soviet soldiers during World War II wouldn't have had a problem digesting the dialog above either... I was mostly thinking of the women of the US as I considered the unlikely scenario above...

 

[KSG_Standard]

Yep, this is my room during my last trip to Kuala Lumpur. GREAT hotel. Basically at the bottom of the Petronas Towers. Real wood, and everything was perfect.

View attachment 529795

I got to be part of the team that designed and built the original IT/Telecom infrastructure in the towers. It was an early "smart building". We spec'd out and installed a lot of ATM switches and other stuff in them. I never got to visit the buildings though.

 

[Deftone]

I'd like to do CF layup...I used to do it in my workshop. I was just getting into thermal forming (to create the molds for the cf) when I sold the house and put my gear into storage.

Working for a company that does something interesting will give one the opportunity to look around and see things that might appeal to him/her. Then he/she can try to make a move within the company to that more interesting job.

You can have it! I hate CF layup. Don't like machining CF either. I'll stick with metal.

 

[Tone deaf]

You can have it! I hate CF layup. Don't like machining CF either. I'll stick with metal.

I actually need a metal fab shop for work stuff.

 

[pedecamp]

My son lost 2 jobs in the last couple years. He is 27 years old. Living in our house with mybwife and I . He hardly leaves his bedroom. He plays video games in there for hours. Sometimes doesnt go to bed until 8 or 10 in the morning, sleeps until 6-7 pm, then works out in basement , eats and goes back to room playing video games. I feel terrible. I don't get it. Why would he not want to get out and get a job or do anything? Why is online interaction enough? I try talking to him about it all and he just says he doesnt know what he wants to do. This is not what I want for him. It is not what me or my wife want to see daily in our house. We have no privacy. We are worried about him and why he is living like this and why he is satisfied living this way and doesnt want ir attempt to get more out of his life.
What would you do?
I feel terrible but am dumbfounded at why he is doing this or how I can help.

He could be suffering from depression, talk to him, ask straight out whats going on with him, offer him help if he needs it or get him help. If he pushes back let him know his current lifestyle is unacceptable under your roof, he needs to make some changes if he plans to stay. Is he on unemployment? Does he have a resume? Is he actively seeking employment? I dont think kicking him out is the answer but he needs to get on real time with the rest of the world and be proactive in getting a job and making a change in his life. This is your kid, the key is you want to be supportive and helpful. On the other hand if you do determine he really is just being a lazy sack, a hitch in the Marine Corp would do him some good.

 

[Deftone]

I actually need a metal fab shop for work stuff.

I built an Engineering lab here for tooling a prototype work: Hardinge HLV-H Tool Room lathe and a Bridgeport EZ-TRAK 3 axis cnc mill. We also have a Metal Fab dept. with welders, brake press, shear, etc... and of course a full 5 axis machine shop w/ 15 CNC Mills and 2 CNC lathes.

 

[LtDave32]

Don't forget commercials....you have to have stupid, boorish, bumbling husbands whenever there is a married couple.

Don't forget the futz-fuddling, clumsy, bumbling dad who's driving, and the 6 year old kid in the car seat is infinitely wiser in driving matters. .

 

[Side Burns]

Don't forget commercials....you have to have stupid, boorish, bumbling husbands whenever there is a married couple.

stupid men don’t even know how to assemble a simple crate

 

[Kamen_Kaiju]

More sounds of true equality:

"Okay girls, listen: Mary, I want you to stay right here and lay down suppressive fire at the enemy machine gun crew with your M-60. At the same time I want half of 1st squad-- Karen, Josie, and Celina-- to hook left and try to use that small rise over there as defilade. Once you get there, you start in with the suppressive fire, but semi-auto only to spare ammunition. Just keep their heads down, okay?

...meanwhile, I need the other half of first squad-- Kitty, Teri, and Gibby-- to low crawl about 200 yards behind that rise over to the right. There should be some dead enemy lying around there because we just hit it with a mortar barrage, but be careful: some of 'em might still be alive and just playing dead, so don't hesitate to shoot any or all of them on the way into position. Better safe than sorry, okay?

Now girls, you see how the ridge tapers off at about 200 yards? Okay, that's also gonna put you three close enough to lob grenades into the enemy's position. Because the bastards have learned to throw grenades back the way they came, you guys are gonna need to cook the grenades off for about three seconds before throwing 'em... but stay down until it goes off because you're gonna get an air burst and it will be as easy for you to get fragged as the guys you're trying to kill-- you got that? And I know you've been asked to crawl there-- but I need you to make it as fast as is humanly possible okay?

Okay... everybody ready? Good luck, ladies-- let's go!"


LOL About the only women I can think of who would even understand any of that would be members of the Kurdish, Israeli, or Lebanese military, with maybe a handful of female guerillas scattered here and there throughout the globe...

--R

ETA: Female Soviet soldiers during World War II wouldn't have had a problem digesting the dialog above either... I was mostly thinking of the women of the US as I considered the unlikely scenario above...

"Yes Sir!.... er... Person!... let me just.....gimme a minute..."

 

[PeteK]

Don't forget the futz-fuddling, clumsy, bumbling dad who's driving, and the 6 year old kid in the car seat is infinitely wiser in driving matters. .

My wife and I rewatched The Wonder Years a while back. There was an episode where Kevin is at his girlfriend's house and she and her mom were just bashing on their dad for being a bumbling idiot. Kevin later goes out to the garage with the dad and has a conversation where he realized the guy is actually really smart and super competent and does a lot to take care of the family and the household in general and his family treats him like shit. He asked him why he puts up with it and the dad just replied "I like having a family life. If I didn't put up with it, I'd spend my life alone". Something to that effect. I can't remember exactly what he said. Kevin left all depressed like WTF, that's what married life becomes? What's wrong with these people?

 

[pnuggett]

You never ask a question like this in an online forum. It’s inviting tons of Monday Morning Quarterbacking, “pull yourself up by your bootstraps because I did” bravado, and generally involves tons of people you don’t know telling you what’s what about a situation they don’t understand or have a handle on.

YOU know your son better than anyone here. He was once a baby, then a little boy, then a young man and now a grown man.

YOUR concern tells me you care and that by posting this question here you are seeking some sort of “way in” to express this concern to him.

I’ve heard some good comments here and some rubbish. Giving someone who may be depressed and struggling the boot does not seem like a good idea to me.

If it were me (it’s not of course and my kids are 5 and 8 so I’m not really qualified to give advice here but...) I’d make it clear to him that you want to help and that support is there for him BUT things can’t continue like this, especially if you feel YOUR quality of life is being impacted.

Just my two crusty, dusty sidewalk pennies...

That makes a lot of sense. There may be numerous posts with good advice here but which ones and which one(s) for this specific situation. It's not a one size fits all solution. We all grew up in somewhat different environments and family dynamics. It doesn't matter that I had jobs and worked since I was a kid until I finally retired. That doesn't mean shit. Lots of my friends never had a job until they left college. Some turned out great others were fuckups. Not all kids from the same family are alike. They each have some separate experiences. I think we're all wired different to some degree and there may be many different reasons for a persons behavior.

I think I'd try some of the milder solutions and if they weren't working and before I did something drastic and possibly damaging I'd get some professional expert advice.

 

[six-string]

 

[Roberteaux]

My most favorite Dopey Dad commercial was the one where DD was trying to hang a fireplace mantle...

Poor Dopey Dad is such a bumbling moron that he doesn't even know how to use a bubble level.

So, when he hung the mantle, it wasn't level. In fact, it was so far off level that when Dopey Dad put an antique porcelain pitcher atop it, the pitcher slid the complete length of the mantle and off the end, thence to shatter on the floor.

There were two eight year-olds watching. These were the "Friar's Club Kids" that somebody else once mentioned in conjunction with all Dopey Dad presentations... and of course, they were dismayed to see their idiotic father screwing up some simple chore-- again. They groaned, "Daaaaaaaad!" and face-palmed it.

Enter All-Wise Wife. This woman sees clearly that Dopey Dad might actually be able to mount a fireplace mantle, if only he had a Sears Laser Leveler. So, she bought him one and in the next scene you see All-Wise Wife feeling warm and content to have (once again!) rescued her stoopid husband... and the Friar's Club Kids are just watching TV, which is how you know that Dopey Dad is doing okay: the kids don't need to monitor him. The fireplace mantle looks great, too!

I just laughed when I saw all that shit. And here's why:

Every laser leveler I ever saw comes into its "level configuration" by means of tripod adjustments... and the indicators that allow for a perfectly level configuration are...

...bubble levels built into the tripod!

Hoo boy!

--R

 

[LtDave32]

My most favorite Dopey Dad commercial was the one where DD was trying to hang a fireplace mantle...

Poor Dopey Dad is such a bumbling moron that he doesn't even know how to use a bubble level.

So, when he hung the mantle, it wasn't level. In fact, it was so far off level that when Dopey Dad put an antique porcelain pitcher atop it, the pitcher slid the complete length of the mantle and off the end, thence to shatter on the floor.

There were two eight year-olds watching. These were the "Friar's Club Kids" that somebody else once mentioned in conjunction with all Dopey Dad presentations... and of course, they were dismayed to see their idiotic father screwing up some simple chore-- again. They groaned, "Daaaaaaaad!" and face-palmed it.

Enter All Wise Wife. This woman sees clearly that Dopey Dad might actually be able to mount a fireplace mantle, if only he had a Sears Laser Leveler. So, she bought him one and in the next scene you see All Wise Wife feeling warm and content to have (once again!) rescued her stoopid husband... and the Friar's Club Kids are just watching TV, which is how you know that Dopey Dad is doing okay. The kids don't need to monitor him. The fireplace mantle looks great, too!

I just laughed when I saw all that shit. And here's why:

Every laser leveler I ever saw comes into its "level configuration" by means of tripod adjustments... and the indicators that allow for a perfectly level configuration are...

...bubble levels built into the tripod!

Hoo boy!

--R

Seen that.

Absolutely pathetic.

Poor dad; the hapless sperm donor that the wife, kids and even the damn dog has to take care of and bail out of trouble.

 

[LP121]

Seen that.

Absolutely pathetic.

Poor dad; the hapless sperm donor that the wife, kids and even the damn dog has to take care of and bail out of trouble.

It's like you've known me all my life.

 

[joba]

Extremely difficult to judge from afar . Its hard enough to help someone when you live with them daily. Most positive life habits and disciplines are usually formed at a very young age. I don't know his history from a young child. Hard to flip a switch at twenty seven. Hope your family gets all the help you need and a positive outcome.

 

[Deftone]

EVERYONE comes from somewhere different. Some have it easy, some have it hard. It doesn't matter, the goals are still the same. SURVIVE and eventually, hopefully, prosper.

Go check 3rd world countries, they would KILL (and sometimes they do) to come here for the opportunity. ANY kid in a developed nation has a HUGE advantage.

Look at nature; It's brutal and unfair. We are breeding weak and lazy through sympathy. Life is hard, learn how to work, fight and survive.

The kid is not the problem, the parent enabler is the problem.