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Discussion in 'The Backstage' started by Turd, Mar 8, 2018.
Pfft.........I'm thinking about a GG Allin tribute band.
Sponsored by ex-lax.
Try playing bass when for the ~23 years prior to that you played nothing but guitar.
Guitar envy is real. No wonder I enjoyed farting on the lot who conned me into playing bass for them.
Guy out front of the stage one night all of a sudden got a big sh*t-eatin' grin on his face..... Dang near killed us.....
My buddy did that to us in a car once. Middle of winter.
Driver jammed on the brakes, and we dove out into the snow. It was horrid. We coined a new "fart" term that day. We all know how many types of farts have different names..... we think this summed it up all too well. "Tasters". It was vile. Hurts to think about even to this day.
I had a GF in college who swore that no matter what she would never fart, use the toilet or do a couple other non-ladylike things in my presence. I was cool with that.
Remember its just chemistry
Hydrogen: 0-50% (flammable)
Carbon dioxide: 10-30%
Methane: 0-10% (flammable)
skatole (a by-product of meat digestion)
indole (a by-product of meat digestion)
methanethiol (a sulfur compound)
hydrogen sulfide (rotten egg odor, flammable)
feces (if present in the rectum)
Also, I once bought a bottled fart.....
Yup... do it all the time. I usually walk across stage & crop dust the singer and the bass player, before returning to my spot.
Nope. I’m scared a mic will pick it up. It would probly never happen but it’s always in the back of my head
Do I look like Joeydego?
But we regularly used Pryo's on stage.
Playing a Pub in London ("The Wellington", Shepherd's Bush - sadly, now a Pharmacy) would always cause plenty of coughing and gagging:
There was on overhead extractor fan.
Amusingly it was connected to a Gents toilet by one side of the stage.
Any one in there when it happened would normally crawl out after a few minutes and we would all be deeply concerned (to the point of crying actual tears ).
Once had to swear to the Chief of the London Fire Brigade that we no longer used them during a sound check.
As he was leaving, re-assured, our engineer let off a back of eight at the front of the stage.
I think he'd given up as he didn't come back in.
That, or he thought it was a drum-check with lights.
Did that once when I was the cue for the next song of a double Queen cover;
Went from playing bass on 'Another One Bites The Dust' into playing keyboards on 'One Vision'.
Finished playing bass and only remembered to switch when the rest of the band all turned to look at me.
I was King Doofus that night!
Our drummer would get very nervous before gigs and this manifested by way of needing a crap after sound checks.
Unfortunately he had a passion for "taramasalata" and the after-effects of these events were not pleasant for the uninitiated / unwary.
You probably got ripped off:
It was a joke souvenir thing, the bottle was olde style medicine type with a cool lable...
I cant find it or i would post a pic.... it had a victorian drawing of a pettycoat girl dispensing the said gass into the vessel...the gas indicated bu skull and crossbones....
Knew another circuit band in Nevada, that had a nightly stink off contest. The best episode was when the band leader went for the winning entry and sharted in mid-song! Apparently it was nasty enough that he stopped singing, dropped his Tele and ran for the bus to change!