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Unread 11-08-2010, 01:05 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Urine Luck! STD App

STD Test? There's an App for That | The New York Observer

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STD Test? There's an App for That

British health officials are hard at work on a new app that will allow users to pee into their cell phones and find out within minutes if they have an STD.

Seriously, we could not make this stuff up if we tried.

According to The Guardian, 4 million pounds have been invested in the UK Clinical Research Collaboration, which is creating a smartphone app that will allow users, "to put urine or saliva on to a computer chip about the size of a USB chip, plug it into their phone or computer and receive a diagnosis within minutes."

The techno-savvy approached is aimed at young brits, who apparently are too embarrased to visit the doctor face to face and have been experiencing rising rates of STD (or STI as they call them cross the pond).

"Your mobile phone can be your mobile doctor. It diagnoses whether you've got one of a range of STIs, such as chlamydia or gonorrhea and tells you where to go next to get treatment," Dr Tariq Sadiq, a senior lecturer and consultant physician in sexual health and HIV at St George's, University of London, who is leading the project, told The Guardian.

If it's really that simple, why wait till after the deed is done? Wouldn't it make more sense for prospective partners to swap fluids before hand, get a reading on their cell phones, and then decide whether or not to "finish the download"?
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Unread 11-08-2010, 01:14 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

hahahahaha
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Unread 11-08-2010, 01:17 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Sounds pretty useful!
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Unread 11-08-2010, 01:24 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Does it take stool samples?
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Unread 11-08-2010, 02:30 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

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Sluts of the world, rejoice!!
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:10 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

And it will call up the health center with your name as well I hope and make you get treatment.....ha ha.....or cut off your phone service....ha ha

We are laffin now, but the government will have us all monitered and branded soon enough.

Too much salt...sector 7B....
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:12 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Guy: Wanna go up to my room and fool around a little?
Girl: First you gotta do something
Guy: What?
Girl: Piss on my phone, to prove you don't have herpes
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:23 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

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Guy: Wanna go up to my room and fool around a little?
Girl: First you gotta do something
Guy: What?
Girl: Piss on my phone, to prove you don't have herpes
I have a feeling that is exactly how it will go.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:29 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

XD just wow... PHAIL
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Go forth and bang chicks.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:33 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

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Originally Posted by kevinh View Post
Guy: Wanna go up to my room and fool around a little?
Girl: First you gotta do something
Guy: What?
Girl: Piss on my phone, to prove you don't have herpes
Girl: Well, looks like you have herpes... aaaand a new phone.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:35 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Quote:
Originally Posted by kevinh View Post
Guy: Wanna go up to my room and fool around a little?
Girl: First you gotta do something
Guy: What?
Girl: Piss on my phone, to prove you don't have herpes
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:35 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

V2.0 will make bisque, if you have the crabs.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 05:43 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

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Originally Posted by Scooter2112 View Post
V2.0 will make bisque, if you have the crabs.
Quote:
Girl: Well, looks like you have herpes... aaaand a new phone.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 06:00 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Good idea. Apparently 40-70% of the active population has an STD of some sort. My statistics info comes from a friend who got tested and the nurse quoted that %.

Soooo if we take the low 40% number and apply it to MLP and its 34,567 members we have 13,826 members that are toxic. Some of them even V.I.P's
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Unread 11-08-2010, 06:22 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

Next up: "Oral Herpes On The Rise!"

Do these so-called "British health officials" know that germs/viruses/STDs aren't just spread by direct contact?

If something like this were to pop up in the USA, we'd all be up shits creek without a paddle!
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Last edited by rockstar232007; 11-08-2010 at 07:15 PM.
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Unread 11-08-2010, 08:05 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Re: Urine Luck! STD App

If Tiger Woods had that app, and Elin got to his phone.. I could only imagine the divorce settlement (that was at like, over 750 million!!!!) would be doubled
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